Back to School....

Well, it has come.... The return to school. Ya know going off track is so interesting, I love the time off, but it takes almost a week to get in the swing of relaxing and taking care of stuff that has been neglected while i teach, then i enjoy the second week and by the time the third and last week comes along, i have a panic attack anxious that i have to go back to school. It is a weird block of time. And then it is 9 weeks of teaching, like nothing happened and we do it all again. School is interesting, i switched schools so i could keep teaching 6th grade, and now i am at the same roadblock yet again i get to switch grades next year. I think i will end up teaching 3rd or 4th. But i am not sure. They never know until later which makes it hard to plan and get ready. But i have to go with the flow. I am excited that i only have a year left of my master's program, and at the end of this year i will officially have my level 2 teaching license. It will be great to start year 4 of teaching! I will no longer be a provisional teacher!!! It's serious now... haha Anyway i am taking a whole bunch of classes and working with district people to nail down classroom management and other issues in the classroom. I am also reading a lot of books about being able to stand up for myself and be assertive and say NO without feeling guilty. I think it will really be beneficial. I apparently have the "disease to please" and just want to make everyone else happy before i focus on myself or my needs. I think that if i stick with it i will be able to really make a difference in my life. I hope. I just need to be more confident and positive. There are always things i want to work on, but they seem to get lost in the shuffle of things, but this time i really want to make it happen. I want to be a better person, share openly, not be so selfish. I want to be proud of my accomplishments, i want to be happy with myself. I think it is interesting to look at happiness. It really is a state of mind, not an accomplishment or something you achieve. It is a choice. And i want to make it a more frequent choice in my life.